Phoning Your Date /

After a date there is always the question of when you should call, first lets deal with how to tell someone you don’t want to see them again;

- Trust your instincts, don’t feel guilty – you obviously aren’t suited so it’s better to tell them so you can both get on with the search for the right person.

- Call them the day after your date, this will seem like you’ve had a little time to think about your decision but you haven’t kept them hanging either.

- How you phrase it is up to you, no need to be insulting to their looks or personality because they will be right for someone out there. ‘I just don’t feel we’re suited’ is fine!

- Don’t be persuaded to see them again or to tell them face to face why you feel this way, you’ve only had one date so they should just move on.

If you do want to see them again……..

- Don’t call the same day, a little mystery will feed enthusiasm but you may want to send a short text message an hour or so after your date saying you enjoyed their company and you hope they got home okay. This will show your interest without seeming too keen.

- Don’t play games, call them within a day (or two at most) at a time you think will be convenient. (if you’re lucky they’ll call you first!).

- Be yourself, relax and just have a general chat as if you are picking up where the date left off. If you are the sort of person who gets tongue tied think of what you’d like to say before you call.

- Don’t witter on for ages, you want them to think you’re a busy and popular person. If things go well longer telephone conversations will come later.

- Be careful what you talk about, mention your ex and they might think you still have unresolved issues in that area. However, if you need them to know something (like divorce, children etc..) just tell them in a straightforward way, don’t be flippant but don’t go into unnecessary detail either. Life is never simple and hopefully they will understand.

- If they don’t answer they’re probably just busy – don’t over think things and start worrying. Leave a short message if they have a voicemail. If there is no reply within a few days try once more and if they don’t respond take the hint and move on. They are either, rude, bad at communication or just aren’t interested in you, shrug it off feel glad you didn’t get stuck with them!