Looking For a Potential Partner /

If pushed, many of us have in our minds a definitive answer to the question “what kind of person do you look for?” Whether it is tall or short, rounded/athletic, black/white, or blonde/brunette, we all have an idea in our minds of how we would want our ideal partner to look. We also have very clear opinions on the type of person we are looking for, smoker/non-smoker, self employed/professional, outgoing or shy and retiring.

The fact of the matter is that although we go out in search of a specific type of person. If we were to meet someone who showed a genuine interest in us, we are not going to turn them down because they don’t fit the required specification. Instead we will quite often reassess our requirements to suit the new opportunity we are faced with.

Beauty often holds the most persuasive card when it comes to dating. I know if shouldn’t but it does. However much we like to think that personality counts as double, there are few of us who would turn down an offer from an attractive person. It is human nature to select the most effective parent to our future children and a lot of our psychological persuasions lie with beauty in this instance.

So you can probably see now why although you have an ideal date in mind, as soon as you are introduced to someone or view an exciting looking profile on a dating website, all of our preconceptions go out the window. We can be moved by so many different factors that we cannot therefore only go for one type of person.

If we were to only date those who we found extremely beautiful, we would find it almost impossible to sustain any sort of meaningful relationship. These sort of shallow relationships do not last long once the initial infatuation is over. It is necessary for a relationship to be built around far more important ideals such as trust and understanding with looks being an added bonus.

Often attractive people, who have relied on their looks for too long, can be equally as shallow as the people who they attract. Without any definitive personality, many will find it difficult to keep their partners interest going or longer than a few short weeks.

It would seem then that when selecting an ideal partner there are a few small points we should consider.

- Most people seek a likeminded person. Someone who shares the same ideals, same moral standards and same views on important subjects.

- Very rarely would you see two totally different people in a relationship with one another. You would never find a very clean person for example, seeking a partner whose personal hygiene leaves something to be desired. The relationship will never work unless one person is prepared to drastically alter who they are. And this is not a good foundation for a fulfilling relationship.

- We normally seek someone who is on our level. Sometimes this can be in relation to mindset, humour or even looks. But in some way, we are looking for our equal.