Want to Find Someone? Then be Prepared to Date /

This sounds like an obvious statement but we’ve all found ourselves feeling led on by someone who then says they’re just ‘not ready’.

Are you over your last relationship /

There is no easy way to tell for sure as every relationship we have makes its mark on us. That’s not a bad thing and it makes us who we are but it is unfair to go out looking for a relationship when you are still hankering over someone else. Make sure you’re not the one giving the ‘not ready’ line by at least knowing you wouldn’t jump back into the past if your ex gave you another chance at things. You need to be sure you are comfortable with moving forward and open to giving someone new an opportunity in your life.

Do you want to have another relationship right now /

You may be over your last relationship but ask yourself if you’re ready to start over again. If you are just really enjoying your own company and pleasing yourself right now then you may end up being unfair and intolerant to a potential partner. There is nothing wrong with wanting your own space or only being interested in going out with your mates but you need to consider if dating will fit into that or if you need more time.

Are you ready to be honest with others about what you want /

If you just want casual flings or no strings sex then you have to say so. It is bad form to fox someone into thinking you want a relationship and this is easily done. If you are both consenting adults and you want to have a one night stand then that’s up to you but don’t dress it up as the start of a relationship or one of you will get hurt. Equally, if you want a relationship and are too scared to say then you are asking for heartache!

Are you prepared to do new things with someone /

If you’ve been in a long relationship, been single for a long time or are just very set in your ways it may seem daunting to be asked to go on dates and try new things? If you are going to quake in your boots at the thought of a stranger seeing you eat then you have some more preparation to do! You can’t be expected to be comfortable jumping out of a plane on your first date but remember that everyone likes doing different things and being willing to try things in your dates world will help you find out who they really are.

Look good, feel good and be positive /

If you want to get back on the dating scene then you owe it to yourself to be looking and feeling your best. Make an effort with your appearance, health and exercise will help this. We can’t all be supermodels but if we do our best to feel comfortable in our own skin the confidence will shine through to others. Don’t expect attention if you blatantly haven’t made an effort!

Have realistic expectations /

The law of odds says you won’t meet ‘the one’ on the first date you go on but there is no way of knowing! Be prepared to date different people, enjoy all the experiences you have as much as possible as they add to your experience and are never a waste of time. Never compare new dates to your ex as the legacy of a past relationship lives on in your memory with complex emotional ties that can blur perspective. Be open minded, positive and wish yourself luck!